*Insert Quote Here*: "We've all got both light and dark inside of us. What matters is the part we choose to act on. That's who we really are." -Sirius Black

First of all, I love Harry Potter. And Sirius Black. I'm in an HP mood because the first few chapters of Chamber of Secrets just opened up on Pottermore. I highly recommend it, especially the character explanations from the great J.K. Rowling herself. I loved Professor McGonagall's background, and the Malfoy family one was very interesting as well. Every time I think of Professor McGonagall right now, however, I think of this:

Have I mentioned how obsessed I am with Downton Abbey lately? So, yesterday night, I promised to lead up to my blog's first birthday with confessions. My first confession isn't really a confession. My closest friends and family members actually know it. So here goes: I'm in love with Tom Hiddleston. Okay, there it is. It's actually embarrassing, to tell you the truth, how attached I've gotten to a celebrity. That I've never met. I've probably watched hours worth of interviews and videos of him, as well as stalked fandom blogs (some are very strange, by the way, and I think some of his fan following needs therapy . . . not me, though, at least for this). Here's my most embarrassing confession about my love of Tom Hiddleston: I got a fake twitter account so I could follow him. Speaking of which, how is Twitter not illegal? It really feels like stalking. Really. So yeah. There's a confession. And here's some great pictures of this beautiful, intelligent, British man.

So now that I've committed one of many obsessions to eternal cyberspace (I've noticed most of my obsession are British men, television, or popular in Britain), I can get into the real stuff. First of all, I'd just like to mention the fact that up until this point in my life, I've considered myself a shy extrovert, in a way. I know that doesn't make much sense. To crave being around people but to be cripplingly shy when I'm around them seems to be a little strange. Despite that, I've always known I need people. I think things are changing, however, and in a good way. I am definitely becoming less cripplingly shy. Instead of crippling, my shyness is verging on manageable. For the first time in my life, I have been able to go to job interviews and speak normally. I have been able to converse with people in social situations without closing up like a clam and turning red. I can give presentations in some of my classes without wanting to fade into the wall behind me. Although I still have a long ways to go before I reach that point where I can do all those things without any shyness or awkwardness, I'm happy with where I am.

On the other side of things, I have become more introverted. Although I speak with a little more freedom and ease, I have withdrawn a little bit more into myself. I don't divulge as much as I did with previous friends with my current friends. I think this might be because I'm afraid of judgement. I have formed more solid opinions and ideas, and I feel like if I put them out there, they'll be judged, ripped apart, or just disregarded. Sometimes I feel drained when I am around people, even my closest friends. I have come to depend on alone time, even if it is just time with my headphones blocking out the world as I read online fandom about Downton Abbey or Tom Hiddleston.

Whatever my issues are, let's just say that I'm a loner that likes being around people, but only if I'm left alone and unnoticed, unless I want to be noticed or talking to someone. There you have it. Simple!

Here's a great song that just came on my Pandora station, so enjoy: